A Different Definition Of Marriage.

The next morning I woke up with a text from Tony, “I had a great time last night, I almost pulled you over on Melrose to give you a proper kiss goodnight.”

Wtf, I thought. YOU ARE MARRIED! I know he said they were not “married” in the traditional sense of the word but come on. Ugh, I knew better than this…but damn he was sexy. I typed back “That would have been interesting, have a great day!” I thought my response was a bit flirty but not too overt.

Luckily I had therapy the next day. I shamefully told Sabrina about Tony. To my surprise, she did not tell me that I should be given a scarlet letter to wear across my chest. She explained to me that everyone has a different definition of marriage, and it was not up to me to judge what his marriage was or was not. If I enjoyed spending my time with him, then that was my decision. I told her I was impressed with the fact he even told me that a wife existed! Sabrina’s bottom was this; I needed to be fully aware that this would never go anywhere and as long as I kept my boundaries up I could enjoy the ‘entertainment’ of knowing a nice, interesting, charming man. I would have used the words; hot, sexy, confident and successful man but this wasn’t a moment to split hairs. I thought about her advice a lot. I also could not ignore the fact that I was fresh out of a marriage with a man who cheated one me. I decided I had to speak to him about it.

By midweek Tony text to ask me out on Friday night, I already had dinner plans with a few friends but told him I would meet him after for a drink. As my car pulled up to valet, my stomach was full of butterflies. I kept telling myself not to get too involved or excited, this could not go anywhere. Looking back I know that part of the reason I was so excited about Tony was precisely that this could not go anywhere. I could have fun with a great guy and not worry about where it was going or commitment. I knew the outcome of this relationship.

I walked into the bar and found Tony in deep conversation with the bartender. Turns out she had worked at one of his restaurants years ago. We cracked a bottle of his wine, talked, laughed; he introduced me to people and before we knew it over an hour had passed. As we walked to the next bar I would catch him looking at me, I never let on that I noticed but damn it was nice to be looked at that way. Married or not, this was the best non-date / date that I had had in a very long time!

As we walked he suggested we go to this little bar in the lobby of a hotel, it just happens to be a favorite spot of mine and it just happened to be in his hotel. After a drink, he stood up and said, “Oh shit I forgot, I had a bottle of my favorite wine sent to me, and it arrived today. Let’s drink that!”

“Sounds great,” I said, “by all means let’s drink it!”

“Perfect it is in my room, let’s go grab it and we can come back to the bar.” He said. Ah, there was the catch, it was almost cute that he thought I didn’t know what was going on. I certainly wasn’t going to sit in the bar alone, so I agreed to walk the long winding path to his room to fetch the bottle of wine.

Since he stayed in town for months at a time, he had a great big suite that looked like it was lived in. I have always secretly wanted to live in a hotel, so it was a bit like peeking into my fantasy. The wine was fantastic, but the kiss he gave me was even better. I don’t even remember if we finished the wine or not but I do remember waking up in his room and being very proud of myself for not sleeping with him! Well I guess technically I slept with him but I didn’t ‘sleep’ with him.

After a brief make-out session, he had to leave for work, and I wanted to escape before the sun was up too high. As we walked out to our cars, he said hello to every single person working at the hotel. This was defiantly not the first time the staff had seen him leave at 6 am with a woman. We said our goodbyes, and before I got in my car, he pulled me into him and whispered in my ear, “I can’t wait to f*ck you.” Kissed me on the cheek and jumped into his car. I got into my car and thought to myself; damn you are in trouble.

The rest of the weekend, I couldn’t get him out of my head. We exchanged a few flirty text, and he asked if he could see me Monday night. I hadn’t told anyone about him. I didn’t have the nerve; I wasn’t proud of what I was doing. The next time we were at dinner we ended back up at his hotel again, he opened another fantastic bottle of wine, and we sat on the balcony of his suite and just started talking. It was one of those conversations where you talk about everything that pops into your head and the next day you can’t even remember what you said. I finally brought up the subject I wasn’t supposed to bring up, his wife.

“So talk to me about your wife,” I said with a slight smile. He sort of laughed and said, “sure, what do you want to know?” Of course, my head was spinning with a thousand questions; Does she know you date other people? Do people here know you are married? What do your kids think? How long has this been going on? Do you think you will divorce her? Does the public know? But instead of making it an interrogation I said, “why don’t you tell me what you want and then I can ask questions.”

He began talking about how they got together quickly and she was a huge part of his business and that they were in love with other once but that had faded for both of them over the years. He loved his kids more than anything, but he also wanted to live his life. She never traveled with him and rarely would visit, usually only when he was traveling abroad, and she would bring the children. Then the real kicker came out; “and yes, she knows I date. I had a year and half long relationship that ended about six months ago and my wife was aware.” My mouth almost hit the floor. It also seemed that a green light started flashing in the background. I tried not to react too much to anything he was saying other than to ask if his life made him happy. When he said that it did I told him, that was all that mattered. I excused myself to the ladies room and splashed some water on my face.

When I walked out of the bathroom Tony was in the middle of the room, lights were dim, our wine had been moved inside and music was on. Damn he was quick, I thought to myself. When I asked him what he was doing, he just smiled and walked toward me. Before I could follow up my question, he had wrapped his arms around me and was deeply kissing me. The kind of kiss that makes you forget your own name.

Single & Stylish,

xx Keylee

Sabrina told me I didn’t need a scarlet letter, but red was still my favorite color! Here are some of my favorite red pieces for summer!

 

*All of the events I have written about in the above and previous posts are about me, my life, my experiences and from my point of view.

© Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and KeyleeStyle.com, 2015. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and KeyleeStyle.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Twenty Seconds Of Insane Courage.

After dinner with a friend it happened, my 20 seconds of total courage. I was in the elevator and gave a courtesy hello to the man that walked in with me. I usually never even look at the other person or people in an elevator with me. Once he said hello back, I couldn’t help but look. He was handsome, dressed in a black suit custom black suit, white shirt left slightly open with no tie, glasses, olive skin. More than his physical looks, he had that silent something. From the moment, he opened his mouth I could feel the electricity between us. We both found ourselves at the valet, and we tried to make small talk. I went to what I know, and since he was wearing the most beautiful pair of black Italian shoes I decided to comment. The best part was that he had different color laces, one that had come with the shoe in black and the other; he had obviously put the lace in the shoe himself, was blue. So I said that the obvious, “ I like your laces.”

He smiled slightly and said, “Yeah, well I need to take them to wardrobe and have them fix the lacing.”

“Well if we weren’t standing in a valet line I would fix them for you, it’s what I do for a living.” I quipped back.

“I’m Tony,” he said as he stuck out his hand.

“Hi, my name Keylee,” I replied.

He smiled at me, and the chemistry was strong I felt like the walls behind him were moving around us. You know, one of those moments when the world keeps moving, but you stand still? Suddenly my car pulled up.

“Is that your car?” He asked, knowing it wasn’t his.

“Yeah,” I said like I was thirteen years old.

“Too bad,” he replied.

“ Yeah, too bad,” I repeated. “Well, see you around.”

“I hope,” he replied with a slight smile.

Damn! I thought to myself. He was cute and nice, I wish the valet would have taken their time! Why did my car come so fast? As I pulled out of the garage, the attendant took my ticket. I could see another car pulling around, and I assumed it was his. I decided to be brave, I reached in my handbag and got a business card.

“There is going to me a handsome man in a black suit pulling out directly behind me, would you please give this to him?” I said to the attendant.

“Sure,” he answered clearly taken back a bit by my request.

I thanked him with a smile and pulled out of the garage. Go me, I thought to myself!

Within two minutes, my text alert went off on my phone. At the next stoplight I looked down, it was from a number I didn’t know, the text read; “The best move I have seen yet. Very smooth. I like it.”

My stomach flipped. I waited till I got home, only about 5 minutes, and text him back, “Thanks, I do what I can! It was nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too, maybe we could go to dinner sometime?” He shot back.

“Is that an invite?” I text.

“Yeah, I will text you tomorrow from set when I know my schedule. Have a good night.” He shot back.

I, of course, didn’t text him back, and the cynical part of me thought it would be the last time I would hear from him. The single hopeful part of me felt my stomach flip again. What does he mean, “on set?” Ugh, clearing he worked in the industry- blah. I had no interest in dating an actor!

The next morning I got out of bed with a bit of bounce in my step, patting myself on the back for my bold move! Even if nothing else happened, it was a good move.

By lunch, he had text me again asking me to dinner. I was leaving town for the weekend but said I would be back early the following week, and I would love to meet him for dinner. He text back, “great, I will make a plan and let you know.”

Again, history had taught me not to hold my breath but something about him was different. That weekend I was in Chicago for a girlfriends birthday, I mentioned my impending date but that I couldn’t figure out who he was. After a bit of research it landed, and I was in shock. He was not only a bi-costal restaurant owner he was also working in television though I was totally sure what his project was. Us girls were chatting about him over a few cocktails when one of the girls piped up, “isn’t he married?” “WHAT,” I shrieked. “Are you serious? I don’t think so. Maybe we have the wrong guy?” I said, praying I was right. Damn it Google image, it was no mistake that was Tony though I couldn’t find anything about a wife. I decided to change the subject and deal with this later.

When I got back to LA, all I could think about was Tony. About that time he text to confirm dinner. I agreed, and it suddenly occurred to me, maybe this is a business dinner. I mentioned that I was a stylist, and maybe he needs one. Maybe he has zero interest in me at all, and this is all about work. I decided to play it safe and pick a dress that was 90% businesswoman and 10% sexy businesswoman, a bold handbag and Louboutins to top off the look. It was perfect for my non-date/ possible business meeting evening.

When I walked into the restaurant, which I had never been to, the first thing I noticed was his face on a cookbook, front, and center. Wait, what? Did he ask me to dinner at his restaurant? Part of me sighed with relief; clearly this was a business meeting. When I told the host, I was there to meet Tony she immediately took me to a fabulous table and asked me to wait. Soon he showed up with a bottle of wine and sat down. I noticed his name was on the bottle, but I said nothing. We made small talk at first and when it was time to order, he asked what I liked. I told him just to order, he obviously knew the best things on the menu. The wine was amazing, the food was fabulous, and the conversation beat it all.

As we sat there, I went back and forth in my head. Date or meeting? Date or meeting? He told me he like my dress, totally a date! It felt like a date; the conversation was like a date, and I wanted to kiss him like it was a date. Then he turned the conversation to work, so maybe it was a meeting. I was confused.

Then the conversation turned back into a date, “so do you have any kids?” He asked.

I gave my standard date answer, “No, not yet, but I defiantly want a family.”

“Kids are the best,” he said.

“So you have kids?” I asked casually.

“Yeah I have two, they are amazing.” He said with a smile as he reached for his phone.

As he scrolled through photos of his two boys, one photo was with a woman that appeared to be a mom. “Is that his mom?” I asked.

“Yeah, that is my wife.” He said like it was no big deal.

Meeting, yep this is a meeting, this for sure is a meeting. Oh, shit I thought to myself I hope he doesn’t think that I think this is a date.

He went on, “we haven’t been married very long and are separated but are really good friends, so we are staying together for the boys. We don’t even really live together anymore.”

No, no, no, I said to myself. It doesn’t matter what he says; he is MARRIED! End of story.

As we finished dinner and walked to the valet, I handed them my ticket. As we stood waiting for my car, it felt like a date again. Something about his eyes was mesmerizing. As my car pulled up he gave me a hug, I thanked him for dinner, and we said goodbye. He got into his car, and I drove home. “DAMN IT,” I screamed in my car alone. I have a connection with this guy and of course he is fucking married! Sigh.

Single and Stylish,
xx Keylee

Give the attendant my business card was a bold move and if you know me I do love bold things. Nothing says bold like a bright red handbag! I am loving the new super bright orange-red and poppy red colors for summer!

 

*All of the events I have written about in the above and previous posts are about me, my life, my experiences and from my point of view.

© Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and KeyleeStyle.com, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and KeyleeStyle.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Ding Dong The Dickheads Dead!

It is a very surreal feeling to one day open your mail and get a notice from the state that your marriage is officially over. It is a true mix of emotions; happy, sad, elation, failure, success, motivation, excitement and so on. On March 18, 2013 I experienced that feeling (for the second time). I opened the papers telling me that as of March 14, 2013 I was officially and legally divorced – hallelujah! I also discovered that my x had not paid me the correct amount of settlement he owed me on top of that I still did not have my belongings back. I wanted my custom-made Chanel flats back, and I wanted them NOW!

I quickly sent out a group text to my close friends, letting them know the joyful news!

“Congrats!” “Can’t wait to celebrate!” “About fucking time!” were just a few of the cheerful responses I got. My favorite though was “Ding Dong the Dickheads Dead!” LOL, it still makes me giggle when I say it in my head, singing it like the Wizard of Oz original!

In light of this financial discovery, I called my lawyer and asked him what I should do. I made the phone call as quickly as possible; I had been very happy not paying him for the last few months, but I needed a word of advice. He suggested I try to resolve the matter directly with my x, via email, and if that didn’t work he would be happy to draft a letter and alert the court.

So I did just that. I constructed a very civil email stating that I needed my items back as soon as possible and that according to our final papers I was due additional money. He didn’t owe me that much money, but my settlement was such joke anyway, and I wanted to make sure I got all of it! He replied the next day letting me know that he was very busy. He was getting quotes from movers and would let me know shortly but he was sure to tell me that he was traveling a lot for work so it might take a while. Of course, sure I thought, it had only been 14 months, and I can totally see how he would need some more time to return things that didn’t belong to him! What a jerk I thought to myself but decided not to be a bitch about it. You get more bees with honey, right? I simply wrote him back to say that I understand he is busy, but I need the money, which he didn’t address at all in his reply, and my belongings back as soon as possible.

He sent me an email a few days later, telling me how tight money was for him right now. He also didn’t like the quotes he and been given by movers, so he was looking for a few more. I replied with a short and curt email stating that I would hate to have to get our lawyers involved. He quickly shot back an email expressing his hatred for my lawyer and his inability to bay any additional billable hours to his legal team.

The next day I was flying to Scottsdale to spend time with my family and our close friends. It was spring break for my nieces, and I couldn’t wait to see them. I was filling my family in on the great news about my divorce and mentioned that he still owned me money and my things. I followed up by telling them that I was looking at the bright side and focusing on how happy I was now that I was officially divorced. I also said that I was handling it myself, so I didn’t have to pay my lawyer again. Suddenly I noticed that my father was turning a shade of red I had never seen. When I asked what was wrong, he said this, “I am sick and tired of this shit and you being jerked around by him. Look, he returns your belongings and pays you your money right now, or I am taking over. My lawyer will handle the case, and I will keep his ass in court just for fun if I have to. Tell him I said that!” Damn I love my dad!

I have to admit that my parents had been wonderful during my divorce and, at my request, had let me handle it. It was my mistake, and I needed to figure it out myself and up until now I had been doing a pretty good job. I had only seen that look in my dad’s eye a few times, and I knew he meant business. It told him how thankful I was for his support but asked that he let me speak to my x before his lawyer did anything. He agreed.

After dinner that night I decided to write him another email, I got the point right away. I also cc’d my father. The email was something like this;

Dear x.

Good news, I agree, I would hate to have our lawyers get involved as well and to be honest I don’t’ want to deal with my lawyer either. The bad news for you is that it wouldn’t be my lawyer, it will be my fathers. He has stayed away from our divorce, per my request, but that is not the case any longer. I either have my belonging delivered to LA, and your payments brought current by the end of the month or legal actions will be taken. My father will control and fund all legal expenses on my end from this time forward. It has taken a ridiculous amount of time for you to send my things, and I am done waiting. I am sorry it has come to this. Please let me know your arrangements as you as you make them.

Sincerely,
Keylee

Well, within three days I had a check bringing his payments current, and I had a scheduled date to receive my things from the movers he miraculously found. It was a miracle- LOL.

Standing on the sidewalk of a Public Storage is not my idea of a fun time. As the unmarked moving truck pulled up, and I met the men who had my life in their hands, I got a sick feeling in my stomach. As they began to unload my life that was packed in boxes and wheel it into a storage unit I started to feel light-headed. Jack told me to sit on the curb and take a rest, even more glamorous than standing on the sidewalk. As I watched, things being rolled off the back of the truck I could tell things were missing. My coffee table, an area rug, my couch, etc. but at that moment I didn’t even care- I just wanted it over. Once they had finished loading the unit, Jack asked if I wanted to look to make sure everything was there. I told him to lock the door, we were leaving, I didn’t even want to look at the stuff.

When I asked the head guy what I needed to sign to get out of there, he said, “I was the guy who picked up all of these things from your husband.”

“Ex- husband,” I quickly corrected him.

He went on to say, “you know I think he really misses you. The way he talks about you, you can tell he still loves you, you know. He said he wished you didn’t move out.”

Trying not scream in the nice mans face I simply signed my name and said, “well then you can tell him he shouldn’t have had a girlfriend the entire time we were together and married.”

I couldn’t even look him in the eye, I took my copy of whatever it was I had signed and walked to my car. How dare he tell me that my husband misses me?? What fucking business is it of his? He had a lot of nerve, and he better be glad I had taken an emotional kick in the gut that day and wasn’t up to my full strength.

Single & Stylish,
xx Keylee

 

*All of the events I have written about in the above and previous posts are about me, my life, my experiences and from my point of view.

© Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and KeyleeStyle.com, 2014. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Keylee Sanders, Style Studio LLC and KeyleeStyle.com with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Summer Style To The Max.

When I want effortless summer style, I reach for a maxi dress every time! The look is easy breezy yet sexy and glamorous. The maxi dress works for almost every occasion; wedding guest, romantic dinner out, beach coverup, shopping at the farmers market, weekend brunch, etc.
You can easily transform your maxi dress with shoes and accessories. Heels, stacked bangles, and big earrings for a dressier feel or flats, scarf, and a crossbody bag for weekend relaxing in style. Today I am featuring some fabulous maxi dresses and a few key pairs of shoes, the best part is that everything in today’s post is on sale!

Happy Shopping!

xx Keylee